2014 Regional Reflections

"A key discovery is that we cannot win; we can only dissolve.  And in the moment of dissolution, what remains is that for which we have been hoping all along; unbounded love & effortless, abundant being."  - David Deida

Hang Snatch PR @ 155lbs

A couple years back I was having dinner with one of my friends/mentors (who also happens to be an awesome coach) & she inquired about my recent training & goals.  I told her about my goal of qualifying for the CrossFit Games.
During this discussion she asked me, "What do you want to feel when you qualify for the Games?"
I don't remember exactly what I said, but I remember being taken back by this questioning of my feelings around my goal.  I hadn't prior given much thought to it.  Rather my focus was simply on the goal, figuring out how to get there & putting in the work.  I said something along the lines of wanting to be on the floor of the big stage and feel the rush from the crowd in the stadium.
She continued to dig deeper with something along the lines of, "What feeling would that experience give you?"
I was still a bit lost by all the curiosity around my feelings & recall having quite a bit of hesitation around my response.  Again, I don't recall my exact response, but I recall wanting to feel pride, self-love & justification that all my training was worthwhile.
Her next remark blew my mind.  She brought to my attention that I could have all of these things irregardless of whether I ever achieve my goal.
At the time, the goal was essentially my be all & end all focus aside from primary needs but I was definitely in a struggle with myself around this goal.  I was struggling with wanting to be an athlete & I felt that in order to justify such a desire that I had to prove myself.  To me, qualifying to the CrossFit Games was my justification for the time & effort I put into doing what I love....training to be the best athlete & person I know how.
I am so thankful that she opened my eyes to this realization.  It didn't happen overnight, but years later I am able to recognize & appreciate my growth.
Looking back I see my struggle with accepting my top value of wanting to be an athlete.  The feeling of wanting to qualify to the Games wasn't just for myself, but it was my way of proving to everyone else...all the people that I created in my head that judged me for all the training I was doing....that all this training & my lack of coaching/working more &/or not taking the time to have babies was worthwhile.  I created pressure to justify myself & my own values.  I was stuck on what I perceived as societal expectations.  I felt like if I didn't qualify to the Games that I was disappointing people & I hate disappointing people.

My proud Momma 

Possibly my youngest & most enthusiastic supporters

In recent months I've been putting a lot of effort towards self-love & acceptance of my values.  I had a period before the Open where I started to fear the disappointment that I may cause if I failed to reach my goals.  It's rarely about my own disappointment, but always that I'll disappointment others.  Then I had one of those obvious aha moments that was very freeing for me.  I realized that I had been to Regionals for five consecutive years now & not once had I qualified for the Games despite this always being at least a dream if not yet formed into a distinct goal.  Yet whenever I returned to the gym everyone still welcomed me with open arms & excitement to have me back in action as their coach.  They still supported my pursuits as an athlete.  No one has ever said, "You didn't even come close to qualifying I can't believe you haven't given this up yet!"  I finally realized I could let go of the idea that I was disappointing others by doing what I love.

This year at Regionals I was able to experience my freedom around this realization.  I reached some of my goals...huge improvement on my placing in the strength event by taking 8th in the hang snatch with 155lbs (last year I was 28th in the strength event!) & to not just be in the final heat on Sunday, but to be in contention to qualify for the Games.  I've always made the final cut at Regionals & the past two years when they haven't had any cuts I've been in the top heat, but this is the first year that I numerically had a legitimate shot.  Unfortunately the last two workouts didn't play out as planned & I dropped from 4th to 7th overall.  However, the biggest victory for myself was my ability to stay positive & experience self-love & acceptance for what was happening in the moment even when it was far less than what I had envisioned.   At CrossFit Asheville we have come to call this a "PR of the Heart"! 

With my fellow teammate & great friend! 

I felt support from so many folks this weekend & I am thankful for each & everyone one of you! The text, FB, IG messages are greatly appreciated & always bring a smile & extra boost when you know others are pulling for you near & far.  I cannot list everyone involved, but I do want to recognize some key folks...
Thank you to Corey Duvall (Stay Active Clinic) for taking the time to work on me & keep me moving well & feeling good workout to workout.  Most of all for being my main support in the direction of my dream to be an athlete.
Much appreciation for the guidance I receive from my coach, James FitzGerald, and the entire OPT Team particularly Mike Lee & Matt Bryant.  While I always prefer to have y'all there in person I hear your words in my head when you're unable to be there.
Shout out to Jacob Ballard of iWebXpert for his support this weekend.  I'm excited to have his help in upleveling this blog into a website in upcoming months!
Thank you to Carter & Amber from ModPaleo for making it easy & delicious for me to eat well during all the heavy training months that lead into Regionals!
A huge thank you to those that made the haul to be there in person this weekend.  It's awesome to look up into the stands and see familiar faces and to have hugs from friends at the start & end of each day.  I have much gratitude for the effort you put forth to provide your support.  Simply, thank you!
Thank you to all the competitors I had the pleasure of sharing the experiences of the weekend.  So many class-acts out there.  I love being a part of the greater fitness community & look forward to cheering on the top-3 ladies in the 2014 Mid-Atlantic Regionals in Carson later this year!  Well deserved ladies!

Up next...Final round of the NPFL Combine in Vegas June 16-18th where I'll go with the goal of being selected to the NPFL Draft in July.  The potential end result is to be signed as a professional athlete in this exciting new sport & opportunity for fitness athletes to specialize their skills in order to play a key role on a team.  It would truly be a dream come true!  Exciting times!! Onward!

4/30-5/13 Training in OPTland

It's been an incredible two weeks training out at OPT.  Had the opportunity to knock out some regional simulation work with some great athletes and have some down time to focus on training.

Here are some snippets from the training and the final day results:

Friday 5/9 PM: 

2 sets 

15-12-9

Power Clean 80lbs/Burpee

My feet felt glued to the ground during the burpees.  Haven't done much fast turnover work here recently.  

Set 1: 2:59, Set 2: 2:52.

It didn't hurt like it should have and recovery was fast from both pieces.

Saturday 5/10 

event 1:

OHS from rack - build to a 2RM every 90 sec 

u have 12 total attempts, start with empty bar

2 x 35-65-85-105-115-125-135-145-150-155-160 1 x 165 F coming up on the 2nd (10lb PR)

rest 15 min This ended up being 35 minutes...no floor space for HS walk

event 2:

for time:

HS walk 20 m

MEd Ball to Shoulder x 5 - 100#

20 ghd sit ups

HS walk 20 m

20 ghd sit ups

MEd Ball to Shoulder x 5 - 100#

HS walk 20 m

9 something...may be still on white board. 

rest 30 min

event 3:

Row 1K time trial

3:48.8

No PR, but probably my best mental effort here.  after a 10 minute rest I started some row warm0ups 20s/25s/35s/45s...was work to get it to 1:53 on those warm-up sets which was a different feel than when I rowed the 1k last week I was easily pulling under pace.  Was able to get into it and accept it even if I wasn't on pace for a PR.  Once I got into it I was able to find some higher gears and ended up finishing much stronger than when I rowed the 3:46. 

Onward!

Sunday Off

Monday- 

Thruster - Heavy Single PR at 170lbs.  Felt powerful coming out of the squat.  Focused on the speed here and it made a difference. 

B. Clean + Hang Squat Clean + Front Squat. Rest 2 minutes x 4

155-165-175-185.  Getting better at trusting slightly bigger jumps.  185 is a hang squat clean PR.  

Tues AM

3 Sets

10 TnG DL Tough

15 Ring Dips in sets of 5

20 Cals Row-Game Pace

Rest 90s 

Went 185-205-225 on deadlifts and speed felt great at 225. 

+ 

3 Sets

20 UB pull-ups

5 OHS (125-135-145)

Rest 3 minutes. 

Practiced taking it OH from front rack and taking it over my head gives me anxiety.  Felt good with it.  UB for 125 & 135 and then failed 5th rep of 145.  Didn't take time to re-establish between reps 4 & 5 and paid for it....learn now!! 

135 set 
145 set 

Tuesday PM
800m Row Time Trial

Rest 12 minutes

500ft Versa Climber Time Trial
3:12- not completely confident how to really get after this here.  It burned but felt like I could have found another gear.

Rest 12 minutes

30 Cals Assault Bike
1:50
15 in 1:00
20 in 1:20

4/29/14 1k Row PR!

4/28

Off

Going to miss these faces when I'm in AZ for 2 weeks!

4/29

AM
For time:
300m ski
200m run
30 cal AD

ski 1:28

~50s on run out/back

1:10 for 32 cals

3:39 overall

PM
For time:
row 1000m

When I finished the monitor read 3:45.9.  When I came back later to pull up the splits it read 3:46.0.  Funny how 1/10th can feel so different.  An 8s improvement nonetheless so I'll take it! 

4/30

OPT Scottsdale

2014 River Ruckus 4/26 -Individual Comp

This weekend was the 2nd annual Revici River Ruckus in Asheville, NC.    I had won last year only due to the winner takes all nature of the final and wanted to come back and see what I could do this year.  My homegirl, Kate Miller, was competing with me in the Individual and then we paired up with our partners, Corey & Rick, in the team event on Sunday.

It's been interesting to observe my own growth and shifts as an athlete.  For so long I struggled with a state of dread around competitions.  I'd wake up on those mornings and feel like I hated competing and would question why I even bothered signing up.  My coach once told me, "You just have to get over the wall".  For me, the first event was typically that wall, but sometimes it took the entire event to be complete before I could finally breathe and look back with appreciation towards my involvement & my learnings & growth that came from each experience.     

Tough to pinpoint exactly why this shift has transpired for me, but my best answer would be a greater accepting of my own values.  Once I realized I wanted to be an athlete I carried a lot of shame and guilt around this idea.  Who was I to declare that I wanted to be an athlete and put so much time, energy & resources towards this goal?  What was I going to get from pursuing this goal?  When I couldn't see the direct possibility of making a living or setting myself up to raise a family I struggled.  It was my perspective that as a woman in our society you either work to make a living or pursue raising your own family, &/or some combination there of, yet what I wasn't exposed to was the idea of 30-something female chasing her childhood dreams of becoming an athlete.  I have had to create and accept this idea for myself.  By doing so I have found it easier to live with less stress and more enjoyment.  

Back to the River Ruckus...

Event 1: 

3 RFT

50ft Burpee Broad Jump (hands go where feet land)

20 KBS (2/1.5 pd)

20 Pistols

This one went out fast and I was a good ways off the leaders after round 1.  Moving through the burpees of round 2 I noticed the leaders breaking up their KBS.  I knew that if I could close the gap on the 2nd round that I could continue to go UB and push ahead on round 3.  That is exactly what happened and I took the lead during the burpees of round 3 and never looked back.  

Event 2: 

7 Minute Ascending Ladder

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, ...

C2B Pull-ups

Clean

Shoulder to OH @ 115lbs

In warm-up I did some TnG practice with the shoulder to OH at 95, 115 and then 135.  Popped 135 x 3 off my shoulders comfortably and knew it was going to be a good event.  Went UB on all the C2Bs with no problem.  I don't remember when I started but at some point I would do all the cleans TnG except the last one before brining it to my shoulders.  Then once I got it to my shoulders I went TnG on all the jerks.  Finished a full round of 8 & the C2B & cleans of 9 for another 1st.  

Event 3: 

360m 40# SB run on the track 

40m Front Rack WL w/bag

360m SB run 

40m SB Bear Complex + throw SB for distance 

360m SB run 

Another event that went out really fast and I was a good ways back at the end of the 1st run.  A little bit of doubt snuck in until I got to the WL and strolled by everyone except for Kate going into the 2nd run.  I wasn't able to close on the run, but I held my distance.  She was a state qualifier thrower in high school so I knew I had my work cut out for me on the bear complex.  I focused on moving as relaxed yet as fast as I could on the complex to take advantage of my size and try to turn over the reps faster knowing she'd throw farther.  She got called back on a couple of throws as they were strict about not jumping and sliding our feet during the throw.  This allowed me to edge ahead going into the run and then I shuffled hard trying to pick up my feet all the way into the finish, as once I got into the lead I wanted to keep it.  

Event 4:

50 ft HS Walk Buy in then: 

3 RFT

10 Deadlifts @ 185

25 ft sled push

50 Double unders

25 ft sled push

20 Toes to bar

Kate & I were 1-2 going into the final.  Honestly, I was expecting to have a lead on her off the HS walk, but she was incredibly fast on her hands and had the lead into the first round.  I went UB on the TTB and took the lead back from there until the finish.  

We ended up going 1-2 overall and it was an awesome day of competitive exercise together.  :)
Full results here. 

2014 River Ruckus 4/26 - Team Comp

All 4 of our team members competed in the Individual Saturday and came back for more on Sunday.  While Kate & I have done this a handful of times it was the first time our men have doubled up.  They did a great job and we had a blast!

Event 1:
Rick & I did the
10 minute AMRAP
10 pull-ups
10 Burpee Box Jump Overs
Partners alternate after each round.  I finished 6 rounds & Rick got into a couple burpees on his 6th round.  We took 6th overall which was our worst finish of the day.

Kate & Corey were outside doing a 3 RT wheel barrow push-up goblet squat deal and took 5th.

Event 2:
4 min AMRAP snatches 135/95 (2 bars per team, 1 man, 1 woman at a time)
4 min AMRAP DUs
4 min AMRAP Calories on the rower..each partner must row for 1 minute.

Kate & I were ripping off TnG snatches for the whole first minute and then also did well in the DUs.  I was definitely the weak link of the 4 on the row, but we held our own for a 2nd place overall.

Event 3:
Sandbag relay with short sprints up & down the track.  We'd sprint anywhere from 60m down & back to 10m down & back without the SB and then pick up the SB and squat it 5x and lunge it 4 steps until we covered 10m and then the next person would go.  Unfortunately Kate's hamstrings were not quite ready for the sprinting and she strained it on one of the final sprints.  We still held on for a close 5th overall in the event.

Final Event....was a marathon or at least it felt like it to organize and get going, but it was fun once it started.  It was an elimination final where we started with 10 teams then went down to 8, 6, and 4 to the final round.  Each round had a buy in Rnd 1 it was 30 HSPU/30 DLs @ 185, then it went down by 5 reps 25/20/15 for the next rounds. From there it was bar MUs, sled pulls, thrusters (135/95), sled pull with 1 male/1 female and then switch.  Ended up being 4-8 minutes b/w each round depending on when you finished.   We went 1st or 2nd in each of the 4 heats to finish in 2nd overall to a team with 3 regional qualifiers none of which competed on Saturday.

So finished the weekend with a 1st Individual & 2nd place Team.  Good times had by all!
Full results here. 

Catch up 4/23-4/25 195lbs Squat Clean

4/23

AM
15 min AD Z1
1250m ski Z1
10 min jog and FLR on rings alternating play

Did 300-400mish runs around the block through the grass drive and 60s FLR on rings. about 4 sets total. 

15 min AD Z1

PM
hike Z1

yes about 45 minutes + 60 minutes "Just Stretch" yoga. 

4/24

AM
A. Back squat @10X1; 50% 1rm; 3 reps; 8 sets; rest 30 sec

Done at 120lbs. Flet alright. 
B. Squat clean - build to a heavy single

125-145-155-165-175-185-190-195. Called it. 

+
3 rounds for time:

2 rope climbs
12 db S2OH 50#/h
15 CTB chin ups

6:37

All UB sets but slower transitions especially Rnd 2.  Rnd 1 ~1:30 and I didn't get in a warm-up other than the weightlifting so my mind freaked out a bit once the HR shot up.  Good for me to feel the difference from when I warm up appropriately and when I do not. 

PM
A. Power snatch 1,1,1,1; rest 2 min

Struggled here tonight. 115 was going to be my first weight and then I missed it twice.  Went back down to 105, 110, 115F, 115. 
B. EMOM for 14 min

odd - PP+PJ - building per set

135-145-150-155-145-150-155. Missed judged the build and hips were not feeling powerful so I dropped back down and built back up. 

even - deadlift 255#x3 TnG

Done, tough. 
+
For time:
80m FW 100#/h
10 db snatch 70# alt'ing arms
left significantly more challenging then right...missed a couple in first set here but then improved on 2nd and 3rd set. 
60m FW 100#/h
10 db snatch 70# alt'ing arms
40m FW 100#/h
10 db snatch 70# alt'ing arms
20m FW 100#/h

14:25

4/25

AM
EMOM for 20 min
odd - 9 row cals
even - 9 cal AD

yes, done.  About 28-31s for each

PM
30 min AD Z1
done + plus hike