Rest Day 1/27/12 "January 2, 1999"

Sleep 10p-4:30a
Good energy despite two days of less than ideal sleep thanks to a little help from the power of Starbucks.

Last night I attended my friend, Jana Kellam's, first workshop "Creating Mindsetopia".  I loved the experience and it was definitely worth a night of less sleep.   There is nothing like the positive vibes of being around great people & acknowledging the power we hold as individuals to create and experience a life of happiness!

Growing up I had visions of greatness for myself, but I remember often feeling like they were simply distant dreams that would never become reality.  I had some incredible people that when I gained the courage to share my BHAGs they encouraged me to believe in myself and go for it!  Thankfully, I still have similar-yet different- people in my life today.

I did some reading today and came across an article about humility and leadership.   One of the last paragraphs particularly resonated with me:

Something interesting happens, too, when we approach situations from a perspective of humility: it opens us up to possibilities, as we choose open-mindedness and curiosity over protecting our point of view. We spend more time in that wonderful space of the beginner's mind, willing to learn from what others have to offer. We move away from pushing into allowing, from insecure to secure, from seeking approval to seeking enlightenment. We forget about being perfect and we enjoy being in the moment. 

Then today I also randomly pulled one of my old training logs out of the closet.  I'm not sure that I've read this particular journal since I wrote the entries.  It was from my junior year in high school.  This was the year my mom and I had a momentous fight over whether I was going to run track or get a job.  She wanted me to start working and save money for college.  I got all pissed off and told her that I was going to earn a college scholarship for running.  She only had the best intentions for me, and honestly I remember thinking I was nuts when I said it, but in a moment of teenage rage I put the idea out into the universe.

To put it into perspective I never even got to run in the league meet my freshmen or sophomore year and two of my teammates/classmates for that matter had run times significantly faster than myself. (only 2 per event get to run varsity in track)  However, it was also the first year I attended Camp Fitch Championship Running Camp.  One of the big things Coach Garcia lectured us about was the power of the mind and how we are no different than anyone else if we only believe in our own abilities.  It lit a fire under my scrawny ass & I spent many hours in my room reading the motivational articles over & over and journaling/visualizing myself achieving my goals.  These goals struck not only excitement, but fear.  A glimpse into my mind from 13 years ago...

Jan 2, 1999 103lbs-feel chunky, but look decent
push-ups 30, 51, 25, 25, 30:161 Sit-ups: 50, 50, 31, 50, 31: 212. 8+glasses H2O Form running: 2 sets of 50 (used to pump my arms as if running with dumbbells in hand...oh my!) 

I am afraid of failure.  I am afraid to push and feel the pain.  I need to feel the joy of accomplishing my goals-expectations-aspirations.  This year I'm determined to overcome that.  Train like an animal & race like an animal.  Prove myself-to me & everyone else-everyone that doubts my abilities & those that have faith in me.  I feel that the two most   important people to do this for are myself & my coach.  As Coach would say, "Nothing to it, but to do it."  9 1/2 hrs sleep 

Ironically, Jana sent out her recent blog post yesterday about "How to deal with fear..."